~ WHO AM I? ~
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"Pleased to meet you ...
hope you guess my name."
Mick Jagger
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I am a compulsive overeater. When I first returned to program after years of relapse, that was all I was. I was a tortured body filled with sugar and fat; anger and hatred. I was a compulsive overeater who was out of control, obese and unhealthy. I was a compulsive overeater dying a slow, horrible and deliberate death. I was on my way to shutting myself off from the world, my family, my husband and myself. I was a compulsive overeater who was losing her grip on the will to live.
Then I came back to program, reached out again, and said simply, "Help me." I found support, love, acceptance and friendship from people who had never seen me or known me. But the fact that I was a stranger to them did not matter. They cared about one thing only: I was a human being reaching out for
help. That was all that mattered to them.
After about a month of recovery something changed in me. I became a compulsive overeater in recovery. I was on a fantastic journey towards a new, healthy and brighter life. I was a compulsive overeater with a future, although I did not -- and still do not know what that future is. Most importantly, I was a compulsive
overeater who realized it's okay to not know what lies ahead. In fact, there is no choice in the matter; it was out of my control. I never had control in the first place. It was all an illusion. When I realized that many
things are simply out of my control, I surrendered my useless struggling and accepted the help offered by my new program family and my Higher Power.
ONE DAY AT A TIME . . .
I will celebrate the fact that I am on the journey to becoming a whole person again.