~ HOPE ~
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In the hour of adversity be not without hope,
For crystal rain falls from black clouds.
Persian poem
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When I was a child, I lived in a fantasy
world and dreamed of all the wonderful
things that would happen to me when I
grew up. I would have a wonderful
husband, beautiful children, a
fulfilling job and, of course, I would
be thin. Unfortunately the fantasy
never materialized, and even when I did
lose weight my life wasn't the perfect
life that I had envisioned. I would lose
weight and then promptly regain it. Life
in general seemed so empty and
futile. No matter how hard I tried,
nothing seemed to work. I hated myself
and my life; it often seemed pointless
to go on.
When I walked into the doors of the
first meeting I ever attended, there was
something on the faces of the people I
met there. I didn't know what it was at
the time, but I saw something that I
wanted. It wasn't that they were all
thin, because many of them were not. So
what was it that these people had that I
didn't? What they had was the hope of
recovery. If they were willing to reach
out to a Higher Power of their
understanding, and if they would work
the program one day at a time, then this
would guarantee them recovery.
I didn't know what recovery meant
then. Because all I wanted was to lose
weight, and because I wanted what they
had, I was prepared to do what they were
doing. I realized then that it wasn't
only about the weight, although that
does play a part. These people were
learning how to live their life sanely,
and even when they struggled with life,
as we do from time to time, there was
always the hope that they could get
through those difficult times by using
the tools and reaching out to others in
the fellowship.
ONE DAY AT A TIME ...
Even when I am going through difficult
times and the future looks gloomy, I
have hope that it will get better if I'm
willing to work a simple program.