Recovery Meditations ~ Fighting ~ One Day At A Time ~ Mar 01, 2011


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And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone ...

The Big Book, page 84

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When one goes through life at full speed

ahead as I have done, it's hard to

really step back and look at one's

life. Everything is happening too fast

and each day seems to blend into the

next and, before you know it, the next

segment of life seems to take over.

When I began my Twelve Step recovery

program, I found myself slowing down

... examining my life ... observing

those around me ... and reflecting on my

past. I began to know who I was and I

didn't like one of the things I

discovered: I was a fighter. I didn't

accept people, places or things unless

and until they met my expectations of

what they should be. I tried to control

situations that I should have walked

away from. I clung to people I should

have distanced myself from. I tried to

manipulate things that were toxic to me,

and make them un-toxic ... and, in the

process, did myself great harm.

When I first read those words from the AABB, "We

have ceased fighting anything or anyone," I felt

it didn't apply to me ... because at that point, I

hadn't categorized myself as a fighter. It took

living and working the Steps to realize that. And

it took living and working the Steps to take the

action necessary to stop being a fighter.

Life is calmer now. Relationships are smoother. I

sometimes miss the excitement of going through

like as though I were on a roller coaster ... but

I won't go back there. Serenity means too much to

me. Fighting is something I have put away forever.


I will direct my thinking and doing to those things in my life which will contribute to a meaningful and pleasant journey.