Recovery Meditations ~ Freedom ~ One Day at a Time ~ April 13, 2011


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And ye shall know the truth, and the

truth shall make you free.

The Bible, Book of John

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In the past, when I was threatened by

another person's thoughts, beliefs,

actions, or desires, I simply deemed

them completely unacceptable and worked

hard to convince the other person just

how wrong they were. I cited all kinds

of religious doctrine and politically

correct ideas to try to convince the

other person why their ideas were


This "convincing" was nothing more than

an attempt to control another so I

wouldn't have to face myself or any of

the things that caused me anxiety and

fear. All I succeeded in doing was

forcing others to help me lie to

myself. Of course, this also created its

own anxiety and fear, so I had to do

something to cover it up. What did I do?

I compulsively overate, I binged, I

purged, I exercised, I starved myself, I

abused laxatives, and on and on.

Today, because of my Higher Power and

the gifts of this program, I can look at

why some thoughts, feelings, beliefs and

desires threaten me. I can be gentle

with myself as I look at which of my

"boo-boo buttons" have been pushed. I

can ask myself how I've been hurt by

these ideas in the past and learn how

those "boo-boo buttons" were produced in

the first place.

Just like a wound, exposing my hurts to

the sunlight helps them heal. Bringing

them out into the light helps me see all

the truth about them--not just the

distorted parts I felt in the

darkness. I can see what my part was and

I can see what the part of others may

have been. Through working the Twelve

Steps, I can find peace with these hurts

and experience the promise of not

regretting or wanting to close the door

on the past.


I can set myself free from the darkness by looking at past hurts in the light of truth.