~ ISOLATION ~
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"Solitude vivifies; isolation kills."
Joseph Roux
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As an introvert and an agoraphobic I
relate to both sides of this quote. From
an introverted point of view, I need
solitude to regroup, renew, and
refresh. It's part of my process in life
to have quiet time by myself in order to
"get it together." When I'm alone I can
read my OA literature and meditate on
what I'm reading and learning. I'm able
to gain new insight and a renewed sense
of direction in my program.
From an agoraphobic point of view,
isolation kills my ability to stick to
my program. When my social anxiety
cycles and it becomes difficult to get
to meetings or make phone calls, I hide
from the world and from my friends and
other OA members who can help me
maintain my abstinence.
Solitude and Isolation are both active
decisions. Both require some
forethought. If I need solitude in order
to regroup, I have to make time for
it. I have to take a walk, read a book,
putter around my house. On the flip
side, if I'm having a hard time with
Program and my social anxiety is
becoming unmanageable, I can either
isolate and spiral down, or I can choose
to take action and get to a meeting,
make a phone call, or ask my sponsor to
meet me for coffee. I don't have to be
alone in this program.
ONE DAY AT A TIME . . .
I remember that I have control over my
actions. Although I need solitude to
heal, I don't have to be alone in my
disease.